The times we live in are marked by disputes and conflicts. People seem to be increasingly losing the ability to live together peacefully. Unfortunately, the church of God is no exception. Yet we Christians are called to make peace: "The fruit of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace" (James 3:18). Forbearance is an underestimated power for preserving peace and love.
The world's lack of peace
One of the greatest causes of the world's problems is humanity's inability to maintain peace. Whether we like it or not, we live almost constantly in the shadow of war. In some countries, it is raging, while in others, an outbreak is fully anticipated. In other parts of the world, weapons for all these armed conflicts are being manufactured and distributed. And we all live with the silent fear that all these arms build-ups are not merely for show. We also find this phenomenon of lack of peace within the church. There is so much injustice in churches because, unfortunately, most people fail to maintain peace. For a variety of reasons, we lose our inner peace far too easily. The causes can be personal, such as illness, failure, or simply because life isn't going as planned. The pressure of external circumstances and the behavior of those around us can also lead us to lose our peace.
The degree to which a Christian shows leniency towards his fellow human beings is the measure of his spiritual nobility.
Practice forbearance and keep the peace
Today we want to focus our attention on one of the most important human qualities that contributes to the preservation of peace – forbearance.
In the Letter to the Ephesians we read the following instruction: “Therefore, I, a prisoner in the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, making every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. There is one body and one Spirit, just as you were called to one hope when you were called; one Lord, one faith, one baptism; one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all. And to each one of us grace has been given according to the measure of Christ’s gift” (Ephesians 4:1-7). I would like to highlight one thought in particular: “bear with one another in love.” Translated from the Russian, this means: “Be patient with one another in love.”
The meaning of the word "forbearance" is somewhat complicated. In common usage, it describes a person's attitude of showing understanding, forgiving kindness. Viewed in the context of God's Word, it refers to a change in the attitude of a person who is spiritually superior to another, a downward movement. An upward movement would be an elevation. However, the Apostle Paul encourages forbearance toward others, and this requires spiritual greatness. What is "spiritual greatness" in the believer's understanding and in God's eyes? In the world, people are generally condescending toward the poor and weak. But consider how the Apostle Paul writes: "Therefore, I urge you […] to live a life worthy of the calling to which you have been called" (Ephesians 4:1). This means that the title "Christian" obligates me to be forbearance toward all people without exception, especially toward my brothers and sisters. The degree to which a Christian shows forbearance toward his fellow human beings is the measure of his spiritual greatness. In the eyes of the world, forbearance is often equated with weakness. However, the Word of God encourages us to be forgiving of one another because it pleases God. It does not call us to a "greatness" associated with pride, but rather to develop ourselves to a spiritual level that enables us to help, support, and bear with others.
A proud person denies their neighbor the right to act according to their own judgment and to express their opinion. The proud person thinks only they are right and that everyone must follow their views. The epitome of this state is the pride of the devil. He was at odds with God, but instead of humbled himself, he wanted to prove himself. That was his downfall. The proud person prevents their neighbor from speaking – what could they possibly say that's wise? Or they keep others from doing anything or taking responsibility – they'll just mess everything up anyway! In contrast, leniency is willing to let others be themselves. The only important thing is to remain faithful to God in everything!
I acknowledge my neighbor's right to have an opinion and to express it. I listen to him and thereby show him my respect.
Christians are called to be peacemakers.
We practice tolerance when we grant each other the right to have an opinion, to think and act independently, and in doing so, we act in accordance with God's will. It's not easy to put this into practice in life. That's why the Apostle Paul expresses it this way: "I, therefore , a prisoner in the Lord, urge you" (Ephesians 4:1). As someone who has experienced firsthand what is right and wrong, he appeals to the members of the church to be worthy of the special position to which they are called. In other translations, it says: "Act worthy of your calling." We Christians are called to be people of tolerance. Look how interesting that is. I grant someone the right to have an opinion and to speak about it. I listen to them and thereby show them my respect. On a certain level, I humble myself, and at the same time, I bow respectfully before them, because I value them highly enough to allow them to have their own opinion. As the Gospel says: “But in humility value others above yourselves” (Philippians 2:3). I must understand that my neighbor may also have an opinion and may even be right, even if I disagree. So what is required of me? To listen with all humility, gentleness, and patience, and to strive to maintain a unified spirit at all times—and not just with words.
Tolerate differing opinions with love
When we sit together with our brothers and sisters in harmony and all agree, it doesn't require any special gentleness or patience to maintain peace. But when we suddenly encounter a dissenting opinion, when someone thinks differently, we might want to exclaim, "You are terribly wrong!" But God tells you otherwise. Let the other person speak, for they have their own opinion about things, and perhaps even about you, and this opinion cannot be changed immediately. Forbearance is an enormous power for maintaining peace and love toward another person. Don't wait inwardly for God's judgment to fall upon someone you believe to be so wrong. And if they are indeed mistaken, then the great God, the Judge of all the earth, will not act unjustly. The most important thing is that we turn to one another in love. May God grant us compassion and patience for those who are lost in their thinking. It is not without reason that the apostle speaks of the "patience" that is needed. We must also strive to preserve the “unity of the Spirit” by uniting our neighbors with the “bond of peace.” Another translation reads: “Strive with all your might to preserve the unity of the Spirit. ”
Forbearance is an enormous power to maintain peace and love towards another person.
Tolerance is not indifference.
We humans often differ greatly in our thinking and can sometimes get lost in our thoughts. If we pay attention to God's voice, we will notice how frequently the Holy Spirit laments the lack of peace and great disunity among believers today. Yet the Lord does not abandon His church and does not bring His wrath upon it. He preserves and saves it and helps His children in every way imaginable. Each individual is called not to distance themselves from their "differently thinking" neighbor, but to be patient, to recognize the other's pain, and to make peace with them with all their might. In practical terms, this can mean letting the other person finish speaking and not interrupting them, even if they are truly mistaken. Especially today, when discord around us is increasing, it is enormously important that peace reigns within us and that true righteousness is sown by striving not to sin. However, our leniency must never turn into a kind of indifference towards the thinking of others – this too would be a sin.
The particular hardship of our time
We live in a time of great spiritual challenges. There is a country where children are taught hatred of their neighboring country in the school subject "Talking About Important Things." And another country is increasingly spreading the ideology that a family with same-sex parents is normal and that every child has the right to choose their own gender. And it seems as if there is no power in the world to oppose these developments. Our children will very soon face the problem of hardly finding a place of peace, amidst the flood of information and all these false teachings. Where can one still speak freely without being interrupted and accused? Who will still tolerate, bear with, and love, even if they disagree with a different opinion? In whose bosom will one find peace, if not in the church?
There was a time in my life when I had many conversations with a wise brother. He didn't agree with anything I said, but he listened to me for a long time. In the end, he always told me that it wasn't he, but God, who could change my mind, because only He knew how to change it. Today, I look back on this brother with great gratitude. After listening attentively, he responded with great love and then dismissed me. I have a long journey of searching behind me, for which I was rewarded after many years. But the fruit of truth within me was sown by those who kept the peace.
We should always and in all things strive to prove ourselves worthy of the calling of a Christian.
Be a role model for children – love, gentleness and patience
We all need the growth of the fruit of righteousness. So that our children can feel the power behind our words and we can confront the world with clear words and truth. And so that behind our words stands not only our opinion, but Christ. When Christ grows in us, our children will be honorable people in every way. A good example from the Bible is the family relationship between Queen Esther and her adoptive father Mordecai. Her upbringing in the right traditions later gave her the right to dialogue and freedom of choice. And in this freedom, they were able to support each other in holiness. We desperately need this today. Our children are learning things that are far removed from God's righteousness. It is becoming increasingly difficult to have a conversation. But until they understand, experience the truth, encounter Christ, and come to Him in prayer, I will wait long and patiently. At the same time, they need to see in me that I have a solid biblical foundation upon which I can build our relationship.
The Apostle Paul points this out to us by concluding his thoughts with the wonderful words: “But to each one of us grace was given according to the measure of Christ’s gift” (Ephesians 4:7). This means that every Christian has a foundation measured by Christ’s gift, even when I find myself in a situation where someone strongly disagrees with me. I must understand that this person is a human being like me, with their own opinion. God does not take his grace away from any of us, and each of us has received the grace that was measured out by Christ. Another translation, in essence, is: “But to each of you a special gift has been given—a share in the generous gift of Christ” (Ephesians 4:7). That is, each of us shares in Christ’s generous gift. Therefore, we need not worry about being misunderstood. We must be humble and patient. Do not contradict, do not get lost in the idea of failing the other person, but continue to practice leniency.
What to do
What can we do when we lack the strength and the right words to be forgiving? How can we share the truth of Christ? First and foremost, we should always strive in every way to prove ourselves worthy of the Christian calling. We must constantly ask God how we can choose the right course of action in each situation—for patience does not mean stubbornly remaining silent with gritted teeth. When we have this foundation in our lives, we will thirst for righteousness, and God will protect our hearts from all that we see and hear. Let us allow God to equip us with the armor of righteousness and be forgiving to one another in love!
Leonid Odesskiy
Israel